Rather than focus on New Year’s resolutions, I’m establishing some key rules to live by. I was deeply moved by the simple and profound messages I picked up from Unfu*ck Yourself by Gary John Bishop. These powerful tools teach you how to clear the clutter in your mind, which often seeps in when you just can’t deal with life anymore. I hope you learn something here that helps guide you to leading a better life than the one you’re willing to put up with.
Embrace the Uncertainties
Great success comes with great risk. What prevents you from taking those risks is a fear of not meeting your expectations, and of what others may think if you fail. To be our best selves, we have to quit caring about what society thinks. So start embracing your uncertainties by doing the things that you normally avoid because of fear. The more you do this, the more you’ll grow.
You’re Defined By Your Actions
How does one stop procrastinating? It’s a vicious cycle that starts with inaction. Inaction manifests doubt and fear. But action drives away your negative thoughts and motivates you to work harder. You don’t have control over the thoughts going through your head, but you do have control over your actions.
Stop thinking so much because you are not defined by your thoughts, but by your actions. The only way to break the cycle of procrastination is to act. Act in your best interest instead of by how you think and feel, as those thoughts may lead to uncertainty. Remember, action may not lead to happiness, but there is no happiness without action.
Relentlessness is focused determined action. Only relentlessness can keep you going if you’re lost or feel like you’ve hit rock bottom. Don’t stop. Just keep going and going. You may not see a change right away, but every step is progress. And then one day you’ll notice how far you’ve come.
Let Go of Your Expectations
It’s not problems that derail you, but a distortion of reality created by your expectations. Expectations hamper your ability to act effectively.
Let go of those expectations now and choose to accept everything as it comes. You may not be cool with all of it; but when you choose acceptance, you won’t waste time being disappointed. Now you are free to solve any issues as they arise and live more happily in the moment.
All of these tools sound so simple. But after years of thinking in a certain way, it may be tough to put them into regular action. Don’t be hard on yourself. Remember to be relentless. One thing I like to do when I feel stuck is to focus on that exact moment and nothing else. It immediately clears every doubt or fear from my head. Then I choose one small step to implement and then another. Before I know it, I’m in a stream of productive action.
If you have any tools to live more mindfully, I’d love to hear them. And I hope you have a productive and happy 2018.